What I have Learned

I think that my idea of family stress and coping has changed a great deal since the beginning of class. I guess I always assumed that it was bad to include families in stress. However, I learned that it is healthy to include families within the coping part. I think this is a wonderful thing because the while family is going through the same trial, so they can sympathize with one another and try to understand what each person is going through. They can depend and rely on each other to get through the trials. Some of the ideas that I decided to leave behind as a result of this class, is that you are not in control of your emotions. However that is not the case. According to the Cognitive Behavior Theory, if you can change the way you think, you can change the way you feel. If I allow myself to think positively, I can be happier and portray happiness. If I am happy, those around me can also be a lot happier as well.

I believe that the Great Plan of Happiness can be and must be present in families because in an eternal perspective, families are eternal and they are designed to make one another happy. The Great Plan of Happiness incorporates families that care about one another, and strive to work together in Harmony to have the spirit in the home and have eternal life. I am grateful for temple marriages that make that possible. I am so excited that I can be with my family for eternity. To me, that is the Great Plan of Happiness. It makes me so excited that I am able to work with them to make hard things possible. I believe with an eternal perspective, it allows my family to work hard to get through hard things. If we are able to get through those hard times together, we can ultimately be happier because our relationship are stronger. 

"Money, Money, Money, Must be Funny, In a Rich Man's World"

I am grateful for my parent's example they have set for me about finances and budgeting. Because of them, I have been able to get through school without debt and without any student loans. I feel that it is an important lesson to learn from parents. However, I do believe that if parents are going to teach finances, they need to live that lifestyle as well. One thing I will always appreciate about my family is that always taught us the value of money. They taught us important principles and self-control, which I believe is one of the greatest lessons to be taught for budgeting. One of the best ways they taught us was by able to visually see where our money was going, which helped me have a lot of self-control. They did this by teaching us to pay for things in cash because that visual is a way to restrain us from over spending. It helped me at least. I take each paycheck and divide it into different sections of things I need to do. 50% in the bank for savings, 40% for different expenses such as rent, gas, groceries and fun. Then the remaining 10% goes to tithing towards my church. By doing this I am able to stick to that and not go outside the bounds I set for myself. I feel like this criteria I set up for myself taught me that I need to be strict and have self-control in order to have good spending habits.

Parents

In The Family: A Proclamation to the World, it states that "Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness. to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live." I strongly believe this statement applies to ALL families. Children deserve to be raised in a home with good principles and standards. First of all, I believe that teaching them certain skills can benefit them.
I can remember when I was growing up in my parents home, my parents always taught us to be self sufficient so that when we grow up, we are able to take care of ourselves.  I believe that by doing his they were able to raise us in the best way possible. They did it with love and the goal was to allow us to be law abiding citizens where ever we go. I think that parents have the biggest influence on their children. I hope that when I am a parent, I am able to raise my child with the best interest at heart and following the principles outlined by the Proclamation.

The Family Under Stress.

I believe that in order for a family to strive, it starts with the parents. I believe that if they are strong and have a good foundation, their relationship will be able to flourish a lot more. Without that strong relationship, pride gets in the way making it very difficult for the families to work together as a unit of one heart and one mind. I believe when pride gets in the way, forgiveness is hard to give. 

I think that one of the main issues with forgiveness is being able to humble your self and let go of pride, and just focus on what needs to be solved and accomplished.

Maybe it is because I am not married and I can’t fully understand the pride cycle within a marriage, but I really do not understand how some people would think it is a good idea to treat a spouse that way. I think that if there is pride in a marriage, then the marriage needs a lot of work. In my opinion, marriage is a lot of hard work, but it takes both couples putting their complete effort into the relationship. Marriage is not a 50/50 thing. Each couple needs to be putting 100% in each. I believe that as they do this, they will become more humble diminishing pride. The more humble they become, the closer they will be drawn together, therefore drawing closer to the Lord. I think that one of the best ways couples can do that is by putting their spouses needs before their home. Being selfless, in my opinion has helped me become humble and I think is a great way to get out of the pride cycle. Marriage is about love and nurturing your spouse. I believe that if pride becomes present, it can destroy the happiness that once was their which could take a lot to get back. I think if couples make sure that the Lord is present and that they are able to have that Christ-like love and throw away the worldly views that it can be a successful marriage.

My all-time favorite scripture is Matthew 11:28-30. I have found a lot of solace and peace when I use it in my life. I have enjoyed the comfort that it brings and how I am able to use it in my life whenever I am stressed. I have learned that through the Lord anything is possible and he is there for us to lift us up when we are down. I believe that the Lord desires us to go to him. He wants us to use his atonement to take away our burdens. That is why he suffered for us. He loves us so much that he died for us so that he can be happy and be forgiven for our sins. Life is really hard, but I have found that if I use the Saviors atonement, that life is a lot easier and worth living!

I believe that scripture fits in really well with the idea of consecrating a marriage as well because it teaches us that we can turn to the Lord to take away our sins and sorrows, but we can also turn to our spouse. One thing that I believe strongly is that our spouse needs to become our greatest friend and the one that we turn to when we need to be strengthened. I believe that in order to make a marriage sacred and consecrated the Lord needs to be present. I strongly believe that the closer the couple draw near to one another, the closer they get to the Lord. That is why I love the idea of a couple giving 100% instead of 50%. If each couple is providing 100% effort into the relationship, they are becoming of one heart and one mind, which is what Zion is. I believe that every married couple can experience Zion in their home if they strive to draw closer to the Lord while at the same time, drawing closer to one another. If they do that, they are no longer two separate individuals living separate lives, but they are one, experiencing life together.

As many people who know me, know that I believe in sex only within the bonds of matrimony. I believe that it is something that is so very sacred that should only be shared with your spouse. It is such a special part of who you are that you could not just give that to just anyone because once you give it away once, it isn't something that you can give away again. I recently learned an amazing analogy that you can compare sex to...
Imagine its your wedding day and you notice this beautifully wrapped package that just seems perfect! Would you go and rip it open all by yourself or would you include your new spouse and do it delicately? I would much prefer the second. It is something that doesn't need to be wild, especially when you are first getting used to one another. I believe that it is okay to get used to one another's  bodies and take your time. This is also especially important because men and women need to remember that they work at different rates. For men, they get satisfied a lot faster than women so this could cause issues, but if the couples are aware of one another and are respectful of their spouse, I think that they can make their sexual intimacy a wonderful thing. 

"Love and Marriage, Love and Marriage, goes together like a horse and carriage"

"Mawaig, Mawaig is vvhat bwings us together this day"... Okay enough with the quotes! This week has been interesting to me because I have been finalizing the details on my wedding that is happening in two months! But something that I have been discussing with classmates and friends is the wedding is more of a cultural celebration. Yes, I am looking forward to it, but I think that I am a lot more excited for the marriage than I am the wedding. To me, a marriage is much more symbolic and means more. It is something that lasts a lifetime! I am committing my heart to anothers and vowing to be faithful and true and to love him unconditionally. Our hearts are going to become connected and we will no longer be living two but living as one. I believe that when you get married there is no yours and mine, but ours. I think if you take on possessions, it can lead down a dangerous path and it is healthier to share things.

Understanding Same Sex Attraction

What is the difference between gender and sex?

Gender: refers to people as social creatures
Sex: refers to our biological make up

The question that has been up for question for the past years is should same-sex marriage be legalized? Gays and Lesbians have been fighting for years to be able to have the right to marry the same gender and spend their lives together. There are Pro's and Con's to each side. For one, it allows equal rights between both male and females and it makes it possible for them to express how they feel and feel accepted by sociecty. On the other hand though, it deprives children of being born into a home with both a mother and a father.

I am by no means homophobic in anyway, but I do believe that Children need to be raised with both a mother and a father because there are just certain things that only a father can provide and things that a mother can provide. For example, woman are naturally more nurturing. While men are better at problem solving. Mothers typically impact the way a child is raised into their adulthood whereas fathers are able to provide and give the feeling of protection. They give a feeling of securtiy for the family.

Altogther, families are all different, they are diverse, but that is what makes them unique!